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Thursday 23 December 2010

Bill Gates joke

For  all of us who feel only the deepest love and affection for the  way computers have enhanced our lives (!?!), read on....
At a  recent computer expo (COMDEX),Bill Gates reportedly compared  the computer industry with the auto industry and stated, 

'If GM had kept up with technology like the computer  industry has, we would all be driving $25 cars that got 1,000  miles to the gallon.'

In  response to Bill's comments, General Motors issued a press  release stating:

If  GM had developed technology like Microsoft, we would all be  driving cars with the following characteristics (and I just  love this part ):

1. For no reason whatsoever, your  car would crash.........
  Twice  a day.

2. Every time they repainted the lines in the  road, you would have to buy a new car.
 
3.  Occasionally your car would die on the freeway for no reason.  You would have to pull to the side of the road, close all of  the windows, shut off the car, restart it, and reopen the  windows before you could continue. For some reason you would  simply accept this.

4. Occasionally, executing a  manoeuvre such as a left turn would cause your car to shut down  and refuse to restart, in which case you would have to  reinstall the engine.
 
5.  Macintosh would make a car that was powered by the sun, was  reliable, five times as fast and twice as easy to drive - but  would run on only five percent of the roads.

6 The  oil, water temperature, and alternator warning lights would  all be replaced by a single 'This Car Has Performed An Illegal  Operation' warning light.
 
I  love the next one!!!
 
7.  The airbag system would ask 'Are you sure?' before deploying.        

8. Occasionally, for no reason whatsoever, your car  would lock you out and refuse to let you in until you  simultaneously lifted the door handle, turned the key and  grabbed hold of the radio antenna.
 
9.  Every time a new car was introduced car buyers would have to  learn how to drive all over again because none of the controls  would operate in the same manner as the old car.

10.  You'd have to press the 'Start' button to turn the engine  off
 
PS - I'd like  to add that when all else fails, you could call 'customer  service' in some foreign country and be instructed in some  foreign language how to fix your car  yourself!!!!

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